Raise Our Men – White Ribbon Film

Raise Our Men features interviews with New Zealand men about their experience of growing up and conforming to male stereotypes (the man box).RaiseOurMen Movie

It’s been developed by White Ribbon NZ as part of this year’s campaign, because how we encourage and expect men to behave, directly affects the high level of domestic violence and sexual harm in this country.

The film picks up on the four key links:

  • Men learn they have more power than women and so feel they are entitled to use violence against women.
  • Men hold to a rigid division of what men do and what women do (gender roles), and use violence to enforce this.
  • Men tend to express anger through aggression and are not encouraged to express all the other feelings they have.
  • Men take their traditional masculinity identity from peers and the media, rather than developing their own more healthy identity.

The film features interviews with nine kiwi men, and in telling their stories, it shows that change is possible – when men are shown and supported to choose a different respectful path. Download the discussion guide on ‘How to effectively use White Ribbon’s Raise Our Men film


White Ribbon hopes the film will prompt discussion about how we raise our boys and male behaviour, and encourage men to use the White Ribbon Toolboxes that outline how to have respectful relationships and respectful sexual relationships.

The film will become a resource for anyone working with men, and young men, to promote positive, respectful behaviour and will be made freely available. Communities that wish to put on free screenings should contact White Ribbon at contact@whiteribbon.org.nz

Download the discussion guide for the film.
Film premiere – 8th Nov, event begins 7:00pm at The Hollywood Cinema, 20 St Georges Rd, Avondale, Auckland. Doors open 6:30pm, and event ends 9:00pm.

‘Using research conducted by White Ribbon in 2016 where we found dads were happy to talk to their daughters about keeping safe, but not to their sons about respectful relationships, say White Ribbon Researcher Garth Baker. “Our 2017 Campaign will focus on giving dads the confidence and tools to talk about respectful relationships and respectful sexual relationships. It will also encourage all men to take a look at whether they are nurturing respectful relationships.’

‘Our campaign will be called ‘Raise our Boys,’ and will focus on preventing violence and harassment by encouraging dads to teach our boys about consent and being respectful. We want to give young men permission to move out of the metaphorical ‘man box’. This involves treating women as equals, and being flexible and expressive – not what’s typically shown in a movie or pornography. The Weinstein revelations and our own awful statistics and stories of violence demonstrate that now more than ever we need to raise our boys.”


2017 Campaign Overview https://whiteribbon.org.nz/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/2017-respectful-relationships-campaign-raise-our-boys.pdf


All Whites v Peru

All Whites v Peru
Saturday 11 November, kick off at 4.15pm.

Want to help us deliver the White Ribbon message at Westpac Stadium in Wellington this Saturday before the big game?

We have a few places left for volunteers to hand out ribbons to the fans, and then you get to watch the game. contact@whiteribbon.org.nz

The Al Whites are right behind White Ribbon which promotes men treating women with respect.

“Most of us have wives and some have daughters”, All White legend Rory Fallon says. “But all of us and all men, have women in their lives – a friend, sister, mother – that they don’t want to see harmed”.

Most kiwi men are respectful towards women, but some women are still treated badly, so White Ribbon promotes respectful relationships to counter men’s violence against women.

Being respectful means treating women as equals and using nonviolent communication, as well as being flexible about how men and women behave. This also includes sexual relationships where everyone enthusiastic consent is necessary.

This year’s White Ribbon campaign theme is ‘Raise our boys’ and promotes fathers and other men helping to build boys and young men’s respect towards others.

Visit White Ribbon’s website (www.whiteribbon.org.nz) to find:

  • Useful toolboxes for men on how they can be respectful.
  • Useful toolbox and videos for fathers on how they can develop their son’s respectful behaviour towards women.
  • A video ‘Raise Our Men’ where New Zealand men talk about their experiences of being a man and how they’ve changed to be more respectful.

The All Whites have thrown their official support behind White Ribbon as it celebrates the many men who have stepped up and have safe, respectful relationships within families.

White Ribbon also encourages all men to challenge each other’s attitudes and behaviour that disrespects women. There’s a toolbox on how to do this on their website.

White Ribbon Day, held each year on the November 25, is when people, particularly men, wear a White Ribbon to show they will stand up, speak out and act to prevent men’s violence towards women.

Rory Fallon explains that “by wearing a White Ribbon you make it clear to other men that you don’t tolerate violence against women. But really it is a commitment to be respectful throughout the year”.

White Ribbon’s campaign Manager Rob McCann says the relationship with the All Whites is another way to encourage men to break the silence around domestic and sexual violence. “White Ribbon is about men talking to other men in ways they’ll understand, and about men choosing to be behave respectful towards others”.

“It’s great to see sports teams stand up and say that you can be tough and play with controlled aggression while also being respectful at home”.

No violence is tolerable. If you know someone who is frightened or intimidated by the behaviour (including verbal and emotional abuse) of someone else, it is not OK. But it is OK to ask for or offer help. Become part of a respectful community.


Why we need respect in New Zealand

  • One in three women will experience partner violence at some time in their lives
  • Most violence against women takes place in the home
  • In violence between couples, it is men’s physical violence that is most likely to cause serious physical and psychological harm
  • Most men are appalled by the amount of violence against women and want more respectful relationships

Getting your community involved in White Ribbon Day

Violence Free North Canterbury, has developed a fantastic initiative to spread the White Ribbon message within their community this year. They are creating and distributing unique White Ribbon packs to businesses in the Waimakariri and Hurunui Districts to maximize the number of local organisations participating.

Each pack will contain White Ribbon posters and flyers as well as cloth ribbons, black and white jellybeans, white ribbon biscuits, balloons and black and white streamers. They have put together sample packs and are currently gauging how many will participate.

Violence Free North Canterbury (VFNC) members, have been canvassing local main street businesses in the towns of Kaiapoi, Rangiora, Oxford, Amberley, Culverden, and Cheviot.

Chris Hurring, Police’s Family Harm Coordinator for the area and Wendy Howe, Waimakariri District Council Community Facilitator were delighted with the response from Rangiora businesses. Some shops are going to create black and white themed window displays, while others in more corporate environments will have white ribbons and flyers at the front desk.

Their initial hope was to have around 100 businesses involved, but have doubled that with 200 businesses committing to take part. As a FVNC member, Oxford Community Trust has taken on the task of putting together the packs. Wendy noted “We weren’t sure what the interest would be like, and are very grateful to the team of volunteers who will be extra busy putting all these packs together as well as producing over 1500 biscuits”.

North Canterbury has faced considerable challenges over the past decade with some of the region affected by the Christchurch earthquakes and the towns further north affected by the Kaikoura earthquake. These events have put considerable pressure on families and heighten the need for support. Reporting of family violence has increased since these events and highlighting anti-violence messaging and promoting respectful relationships is vital.

They are also going to have a presence in local high schools and area schools during White Ribbon week, providing white ribbons and white ribbon biscuits to students who come and have a conversation about White Ribbon.

Their commitment is inspiring and a key to their success seems to be the willingness of representatives from the Council, NGOs and the police to work together to utilize their connections and build meaningful ongoing relationships.

To order your resources for White Ribbon Day CLICK HERE

White Ribbon Researcher Garth Baker joins Bryan Crump on RNZ


This year’s annual White Ribbon campaign starts this month with the theme of Raise Our Sons and focuses on what fathers can do to develop their sons’ respectful behaviour. White Ribbon Researcher Garth Baker joins Bryan Crump on RNZ to tell listeners more.


Garth is the lead researcher within White Ribbon and a White Ribbon Ambassador.

You can check out our Toolboxes here.

Young people are learning how to box and how to have respectful relationships

Billy and Kerri Graham with Naenae and Cannons Creek members and Police

Young people are learning how to box and how to have respectful relationships.

This unusual but effective combination is happening at the Billy Graham Youth Foundation, who have just been accredited by White Ribbon, the annual campaign to prevent men’s violence against women.

“White Ribbon is delighted by the way the Billy Graham Youth Foundation has integrated the development of respectful behaviour into their youth and community work,” says White Ribbon NZ chair, Cam Ronald.

David Graham and Michael Kaufman, White Ribbon Co-founder

Kerri Graham, the Billy Graham Youth Foundation General Manager says “The Billy Graham Youth Foundation takes boys and girls and makes them into champion young men and women, teaching them life skills and values – Respect, Responsibility, Compassion, Consideration, Kindness, Duty, Obedience and Honesty and Truthfulness”.

“Our coaches, volunteers, staff, young boys and girls lead and actively support the White Ribbon kaupapa and we all play a role in building support, visibility and developing a shared understanding of the campaign within our Academies, social groups, workplaces and communities.”

BGYF Academies willingly challenge the behaviours of abusive men and convey key White Ribbon messages directly to its local and wider community.

The endorsement of the Billy Graham Youth Foundation as a White Ribbon Accredited Organisation is a catalyst for the growth of the White Ribbon Campaign, a generational change in the mind set of our children and young people and a reduction in Family Harm across New Zealand.”

“White Ribbon’s annual Respectful Relationships campaign is underway right now, so it’s very timely that we recognised the Billy Graham Youth Foundation” explains Cam Ronald. “White Ribbon aims to prevent men’s’ violence against women, so having more organisations involved makes this much more possible.”

Cam Ronald presents Billy Graham with White Ribbon Business Accreditation

“The way in which they promote White Ribbon’s respectful relationship messages and have developed appropriate policies and staff training is an exemplar, and we hope that other organisation will step up and take an active role in preventing violence.”

“To support our partnership together, we’re very pleased to appoint David Graham of the Billy Graham Youth Foundation as a White Ribbon Ambassador. He exemplifies White Ribbon values, and has the ability to influence many young lives.”

“I am very excited to be taking on this role as a White Ribbon ambassador. We have a fantastic opportunity in the academy to deliver White Ribbon messaging directly to our young men, as well as supporting them by embodying such principles as a coaching staff.”

The Billy Graham Youth Foundation is hosting a visit from the White Ribbon Riders on White Ribbon Day (the 25th of November) at their Cannons Creek Boxing Academy. The White Ribbon Ride is an initiative to tackle this country’s domestic violence record. Cannons Creek Boxing Academy Head Coach, Latu Talu is excited to be hosting the White Ribbon Riders this year and says “the White Ribbon Riders will help our boys, girls, families and the Cannons Creek community to learn from real people, sharing real stories about overcoming domestic violence,” and he hoped the whole community will turn out to support them.

The White Ribbon accreditation programme supports organisations to build violence prevention into their usual business and recognised those who do this effectively. “We’ve previously accreditated The Warehouse, a large retail business. Working with a smaller, local social service like the Billy Graham Youth Foundation demonstrates how any organisation can effectively prevent violence,” says Cam Ronald. “Accreditation recognises the organisation’s commitment and we develop a supportive partnership together”.



For more information contact:

  • Billy Graham Youth Foundation, David Graham, Ph: 027 9211 209
  • White Ribbon NZ, contact – Cam Ronald, Ph: 021 645 155

Campaign Launch 2017

RaiseOurMen Movie

The 2017 White Ribbon campaign launch will take place at the Hollywood Cinema (20 St Georges Rd, Avondale, Auckland) in Auckland on Wednesday 8th November in the evening.

The launch will include the premier of our White Ribbon Film ‘Raise Our Men’, special guests and a special performance by Jason Kerrison.

More details to be announced soon. This event is free.

If you are interests in attending, please complete the contact form.


White Ribbon Workshop with Michael Kaufman

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Michael Kaufman

Michael Kaufman (International co-founder of White Ribbon) will be holding five free workshops across New Zealand. The White Ribbon video ‘Raise Our Men’ will be screened at each venue followed by a workshop on ‘Raising Respectful Men’.

The workshops are to:

  • increase understanding of how New Zealand males are socialised and how this links with the high levels of family and sexual violence against women
  • increase understanding of what action can be taken to mitigate the negative effects of socialisation and reduce men’s violence
  • build community support for White Ribbon’s 2017 campaign, including its focus on male socialisation, and to inform participants how they can use White Ribbon’s campaign and resources in their work

Workshop Dates:

  • Auckland Thursday 9th November, 1pm -4pm
    Grey Lynn Community Centre, 510 Richmond Rd, Grey Lynn
  • Hastings Friday 10th November, 10am-1pm
    Havelock North Function Centre, 30 Te Mata Road, Havelock North
  • Dunedin Wednesday 15th November, 10am-1pm
    Burns Hall, 415 Lower Moray Place, Dunedin
  • Christchurch Thursday 16th November, 10am-1pm
    Matuku Takotako: Sumner Centre, Corner of Wakefield Avenue and Nayland Street, Sumner
  • Wellington Region Friday 17th November, 10am-1pm
    Olive Tree, 478 Jackson Street, Petone, Lower Hutt

Please fill in the form to confirm your attendance at the workshops.